Visual White Noise Theater: Lets have a nice visit with “Frank and Zed” 2021

The last puppet movie I saw that was made for adults was Peter Jackson’s “Meet the Feebles”, it was before Jackson slathered CGI shit all over the screen with “Bored of the Dings”. “Meet the Feebles” featured puppets fucking, getting AIDs, having eating disorders and being addicted to drugs, you know, kid’s stuff. Now I know in the interim that there was one other adult puppet movie that came out which I never saw called “Happy Time Murders” but Melissa McCarthy’s presence makes me not want to see it. However, while rolling through the web site “366 Weird Movies” I came across a review for a movie called “Frank and Zed” which featured all puppets, and watching the trailer made me cum in my pants. I crossed my fingers hoping there was somewhere I could watch it. No such luck, until I visited the filmmaker’s facebook page and web site which was called “Puppetcore” to see if there was anyway I could see it. “Frank and Zed” was going to be streamed through Halloween and I plopped down my money down and what I got was a puppet movie unlike I’d ever seen, a fantasy, horror and comedy, three of my favorite genres mashed together, visually eye popping, gut busting funny, I had a great time watching “Frank and Zed”, the puppets all had personalities of their own right down to the background puppets, “Frank and Zed” is like a mutant hybrid of “Evil Dead 2”, “Meet the Feebles” and “Young Frankenstein”.


I don’t want to give too much away, but the movie tells the tale of Frank who was made from various body parts and Zed who is a zombie whose soul is trapped in its body by the God of Death, whom Frank and Zed were made to serve. The God of Death seeks to rule over a small village but he is slaughtered by the villagers and he puts a curse on the village saying they will all die in a “Orgy of Blood”. A priest and a lord plot to overthrow the king and make the curse not happen by tricking the villagers into killing Frank and Zed whom they see as maintaining the curse and all hell breaks loose. Bones break, blood splatters, brains get eaten etc. I sure hope sooner or later this gets released in physical format, the only draw back to watching it online streaming was that it had a watermark right in the middle of the screen, which was annoying, but I understand why they put it there, to keep theft from happening. “Frank and Zed” took an impressive seven years to make by Portland, OR based filmmaker Jesse Blanchard and crew, the miniatures were shot on the RED camera which was Stanley Kubrick’s favorite lens. Jesse and his crew made all the sets and puppets in his garage and used mainly practical effects, only using CGI for some thunder and electricity, this movie was strictly old school. He helped fund “Frank and Zed” in part through Kickstarter. This movie is a hoot and I can’t wait to watch it again, another hidden newer movie that is actually good. Here is praying “Frank and Zed” comes out in Blu Ray/DVD sooner rather than later. 

So where do you get your brains eaten by “Frank and Zed”? You don’t yet but you can get a little taste with the trailer here:

Go to the castle here:

Their fuckfacebook page (did I just type that? Sorry… NOT!):


Visual White Noise Theater: Show me the way to “After Blue Dirty Paradise” (2021)

A friend sent me a trailer to a movie. I am very skeptical about “newer” movies, so friends and family knowing my weird tastes will send me stuff, I mostly stick with the older stuff and the more unusual and interesting, better, but it just can’t be weird for weird’s sake. Sometimes I’ll watch a trailer and say “Fuck yeah! This proves good newer movies are out there.” Then I watch the film and I am let down, either its too artsy fartsy, its way up its own ass, its boring and/or stupid. I am very picky when it comes to what movies I like and sadly more modern movies have more hoops to jump through for me, and the biggest hoop is “too much CGI”. I do review more modern movies on this site just because I want to shine a light on films that show that the craft of film making isn’t dead. And one of those movies is “After Blue, Dirty Paradise”.

A French film directed by Bertrand Mandico who directed “Wild Boys” which I haven’t seen. This was another movie whose trailer hit me right on the chin, it screamed “1980’s neon Jodorowsky” and of course I didn’t find out until later that “After Blue Dirty Paradise” wasn’t gonna come out to the public until 2022 and that it was playing festivals only. I was pretty pissed off and “Nightstream” came to the rescue just like they had with “Mad God”. Boy oh boy talk about a mind fuck, without giving too much away I wasn’t too far of with my description, this has got “old school” written all over it with barely to no CGI at all, strange lighting, and “Legend” like Tangerine Dream music. Bertrand created his own self contained and world.

“After Blue Dirty Paradise” is a acid freaked, sci fi Western. At first this reminded me a lot of The Muse’s music video “Knights of Cydonia”. The movie takes place on the planet, After Blue, humans are escaping a destroyed earth and they find a planet that can sustain life. The atmosphere acts funny on humans, it makes them grow hair in places they normally don’t (no not there you perv), on women its mainly the neck but in men it makes the hair grow inside and ends up killing all the males, so all births are achieved with insemination. After Blue is a planet populated by women only, there is a very limited use of technology since the populace of After Blue blame technology for the destruction of earth, mainly they still have guns and rifles to hunt and kill each other with.

A teenage girl, played by the pixie, waifish Paula Luna whose nickname is “Toxic” and whose real name is Roxy, is on a beach playing with her friends when she encounters a woman buried up to her chin in sand. The other girls berate and make fun of her, even piss on her. The woman begs Toxic to let her go, Toxic digs her out and she comes out nude with one hairy hand and a rifle, she guns down the other girls. Toxic is hypnotized by the woman and aroused, then the woman runs away. What Toxic didn’t know was that this woman was Kate Bush, a notorious criminal and murderer, the rest of the women in their village make Toxic and her hair dresser mother, Zora, played by Elina Lowensohn who is in the awesome “Let the Corpses Tan” go out to find and kill Kate Bush for the crime of Toxic digging her up. After this a series of strange and surreal events happen, the wandering women looking to kill a fugitive, is a very old Western movie theme. This movie visually and story wise keeps it interesting, this was another movie I wasn’t disappointed in after seeing the trailer. Vinegar Syndrome in partnership with Altered Innocence has released “After Blue” on Blu Ray, link below (I did). At first I thought this movie was going to be preachy and I was hoping I wouldn’t roll my eyes and I didn’t. The message was put across with grace and smarts and if you want me to listen to you even though I might disagree with you, making your point in a interesting and creative way will open my ears. “After Blue Dirty Paradise” has different influences stamped all over it and but their put together so well it becomes its own thing.  One other thing, ZZ Top’s song “Planet of Woman” kept running through my head when I was watching this movie, they must’ve been looking into the future.


Here is the trailer for “After Blue Dirty Paradise”:

An interview with Bertrand Mandico, the director:

You can get “After Blue” on Blu Ray right here:


Visual White Noise Theater: LOL! Fucking “Skins” (2017)

At first I wasn’t gonna even review this movie, sure it is weird and different but “Skins” falls into the “pretentious horseshit” category for me, the artist so full up his/her ass that they can’t see the sunlight. However, sometimes pretentious horseshit can be entertaining and unintentionally hilarious, to me that was “Skins”.

In some ways I wonder if the director, was trying to play this straight or if this was actually a troll, cinema style. If it was a troll it was the best troll pulled on the Netflix/art house crowd who think their “tolerant” and “sophisticated”. Again this is a Spanish movie and maybe the sub titles were mistranslated but even the action on the screen is utterly ridiculous. When I was meant to feel empathy for a twisted, fuck pedophile who wants to sleep with an eleven year old girl who has no eyes, not blind, no eyes, and gives her pink diamonds for eyes while his wife is giving birth I was fucking disgusted, typical of Netflix who would put out a movie like “Cuties”. The scene and the way it was executed made me snicker, then laugh, a fat old madam who runs a cat house of deformed people telling the peder creep that he can’t help who is and its OK to screw kids and then the scene between the eyeless girl and the old man (they don’t show anything) made me bust a gut.

Then there is the guy who has a fetish for deformed women, his deformed girlfriend is fucking a burn victim behind his back, a girl who has a butt hole where her mouth is supposed to be and a mouth where her butt hole is supposed to be is raped by two gay looking guys rape in both, then there is a pregnant dwarf who plays a pink animorphic teddy bear on a kids show she wants to quit and her creepy manager is trying to talk her into having an abortion, then there is a kid who is the son of the pederast who thinks his legs aren’t part of him because he believes that he is a mermaid and his legs should be fins, its one pretentious cluster fuck of deformed, sad sap people who are all looking for sick, twisted love, normally I would dig something like this but all I could do was laugh. If it was trying to say “Love knows no boundaries”, that flew over my head. The kid with legs lays out in traffic and lets the girl with butt hole for a mouth run over his legs while she is speeding away in her car from the two gay looking dudes who are trying to rape her, the guys chasing her look like they would only want to rape other dudes. Now this might sound interesting, it is kind of, but its more funny than anything. Especially at the end, (I don’t care if I spoil it either I wasted my time watching this) where the guy who has a fetish for deformities keeps butt hole mouth girl from jumping off a bridge after getting raped by the two closet gay guys, the fetish guy kisses her and the dude tongues her hairy butt hole/mouth, I roared with laughter and the kid who wants to be a mermaind in the afterlife becomes a glittery, prancing mermaid with fish falling out of the sky. Now if this wasn’t fun and I didn’t get some enjoyment out of it I wouldn’t have even wasted space on it, in some ways I am wasting space and time on this movie. This is pretentious horseshit but it was funny and made me laugh but I won’t watch “Skins” again. If what I wrote above appeals to you have at it, go on Netflix or if your like me and your one of those “FUCK NETFLIX” guys go to a friend’s and watch it if you don’t want to give these cheerleader pederasts any of your money. Over all, fuck this film and if this isn’t a troll fuck the douchey, art hipster who made this bullshit, you made me laugh at least.


White Noise Theater: Only perverted scum watch “Marquis” (1989)

If this movie did not have actors in animatronic masks and stop motion sequences I would’ve not even recommended this thing at all. To me it would’ve been a medium temperature, racy, borderline S and M film but what took a mediocre script from “meh” to “FUCK YEAH”was the animal animatronic masks and stop motion sequences. This is just weird and messed up which means you need to see it.  God damn the French are weird (in a good way).

This being a very loosely based story on the Marquis De Sade and his imprisonment in the Bastille, your gonna get a lot of messed up sex stuff. Marquis’ penis talks to him and he constantly argues with it, he fights his smaller head with his bigger head sometimes he succeeds sometimes he doesn’t which is saying a lot, most men, myself included, let the little guy downstairs make their decisions for them, especially when they are younger which normally leads to disaster.

Your gonna get S and M sequences with people in animal masks, whipping, a man in a pig mask cutting off his own leg, a rat masked man torturing a cow faced maid by milking her, whipping, walls having orgasms…your saying “Wait? Did I read that right?” Yes you fucking did and that is something I thought I’d never ever type.

The story is a mix of things, De Sade in the Bastille, revolutionaries wanting to blow the Bastille up, the authorities trying to blame Marquis for impregnating the girl King Louis raped, a French Revolutionary horse faced woman with a hot body who whips and tortures the rooster faced warden which he gets pleasure out of and the warden gives up info on guard movements in the prison etc.  Not to mention there is stop motion claymation scenes in between, when Marquis tells one of his perverted stories, and when he has a dream.

CGI RANT ALERT! Its nice to see a movie that uses ACTUAL FUCKING PRACTICAL EFFECTS. There I said it and will continue to say it. I love foam rubber, latex, corn syrup blood etc. Any movie that has those elements overwhelmingly present goes in the good book, this movie is in my good book. “Marquis” is something you can’t miss, delectable white noise that will stroke that weird nerve so hard you’ll mentally cum.

“Marquis” was a project for cartoonist Roland Topor who did production design for the French cult animated film “Fantastic Planet” which I also will review sometime down the road, well that road is long, and its gonna be way, way, WAY down the road. Two of the characters, Juilette and Justine are named after two characters from De Sade’s books. This movie might piss some people off no doubt, its almost more creepier and perverted that people in animal masks acted this out as opposed to just straight up people. If you get nightmares easy don’t watch “Marquis” but if you want to be wonderfully disturbed then “Marquis” should be putting you on the rack, my friend.

So where do you want to be whipped? Well if you want it right in the eyes right now go to:

If you want it hard and physical jump on over to the “Trash Palace” great site run by my buddy Brian, he has alot of movies you won’t find anywhere else hit him up here he’s got DVD copies of  “Marquis” just scroll down:

A cool slide show of how they put the masks together for this movie, cool stuff:



White Noise Theater: “Debbie Does Damnation” (1999) and I wish she would do me…

The spice of life: nude strippers, stop motion demons, buckets of fake blood and washed up B movie actors. Makes me weak in the knees so here you got “Debbie Does Damnation” by Eric Brummer, its pretty much an hour long version of his short “Joanna Died and Went to Hell”. Shot on Super 8 and in black and white, the scum and sleaziness just drips out of the screen. Its low budget, its stupid, its offensive and I love it.

So the plot, well, the sound is really shitty on the version I have but from what I could gather, the Devil had his head cut off by two of his lieutenants whom he taught his secrets to, then they betray him and detach his horns which gave him his power, each one has a horn. The Devil needs an uncorrupted soul to get his horns back and Debbie is that uncorrupted soul. One chick is tested out and found wanting, oh and all the souls in hell are naked. If you are found wanting you are eaten by a stop motion, demonic reptile.

Nude chicks with swords, I am sold. Stop motion monsters. SOLD! SOLD! SOLD! So at first the devil despairs of finding the right soul until Debbie shows up, at first her guardian angel tries to keep her from falling into hell but her sins are pulling her down. This cuts from live actors to Barbie dolls, one doll has  wings carrying one without. The one without wings who is Debbie falls into hell and the devil’s emissary, a skull spider, leads her to the Devil’s head who gives his instructions and tells her he’ll let her leave hell if she gets his horns. She agrees.

“Debbie Does Damnation” has naked women running all over the place. Fine with me, an hour long tent pole is what this movie will give you. One of the producers is Slain Wayne, a porn producer and director, according to Eric, there is a rare X rated version where Slain put in hardcore close up shots. Looked all over for that one and it seems to be so rare it is nowhere. One of the lieutenants in the movie is played by B movie veteran William Smith who you’ve seen in everything, there is a huge ass battle near the end of the movie to get the devil’s horns, each lieutenant wants the other’s horn to have ultimate power. Yeah I know, pretty retarded but what do you expect from a movie called “Debbie Does Damnation?”

You want to know the ending to “Debbie Does Damnation”? Fuck up a tree and watch it for yourself down below, eat out that link. Give it an orgasm. When I first wrote my post on Eric Brummer’s insane shorts “Electric Flesh” and “Joanna Died and Went to Hell” which “Debbie Does Damnation” is an hour long version of, I had barely any info on Eric. The few points I could find were scattered here and there, that Eric went on to direct porn, which seemed like a natural evolution from this movie. But there was a “making of” that gave a shit load of info on this movie and Eric’s creative process.

Eric says he made this movie for less than 1,000 dollars, which is hard to believe, it seems chicks would want to be paid to run around nude and I mean paid good. I am just wondering how Eric got these women out of their underwear, not to mention he got William Smith, a B movie character actor in his film and I don’t think even somebody like Bill Smith would take peanuts. Maybe he meant it took under 1000 bucks to make the sets and film it, he says that he made his bricks and stones out of cardboard and paper mache, and the armor out of linoleum. He said that this was his last film on Super 8 and that he wanted to go out with a bang, he wanted the movie to cross the line and be super offensive, he also wanted it to be weird and different. He succeeded at the weird and different thing, part of that was the stop motion cut in with the live action, he said he liked the stop motion sequences the best because he was in complete control, and could take his time, he said its harder dealing with live actors who have schedules, gripes, problems etc. He said he lost interest near the end because he was going through a bad break up at the time, it didn’t show, this thing kept my interest through the whole thing.


You also get a lot of dumb dialogue, like this bit between the two lieutenants when their sword fighting each other “C’mon Jean Claude Van Damme Homo!” Speaking of dialogue, through the whole thing, the dialogue doesn’t sink up with the lips. Brummer claims this is on purpose or maybe its because Brummer is making excuses and had little money, he couldn’t go back and fix the dialogue situation. Nonetheless, an hour is a perfect running time for this movie, if it would’ve went any longer it would’ve dragged, another half n’ hour would’ve been way too long. One hour is short and sweet, this was Brummer’s swan song before he started his descent in to the wet Poon Tang rabbit hole. What a way to go!!!

So here is the sweet spot, play with it and finger it a bit (plus you get the “making of” at the end:

My posts on Eric’s two short films, they are must sees:


White Noise Theater: You dim wit! You and your wife are so stupid you have “Shrunken Heads” (1994)

So what to say about this piece of visual white noise? Its a horror movie…about killer “Shrunken Heads”. Who would make such a movie you ask? Richard Elfman (director), Danny’s brother and Charles Band (producer) of Full Moon infamy of course. You think any major studio would touch a movie called “Shrunken Heads” about killer shrunken heads? Well they make shit like “Avatar” and “Captain Marvel” so its possible they would make something like this but it wouldn’t be executed the same way this was, that is weird and creepy. A gang of 30 year olds harass 12 year old boys and the gang leader’s girl looks like she is 12…uh yeah this movie is off to a rip roarin’ start.

The three boys are Tommy (Aeryk Egan), Freddy (Darris Love who has been in a whole bunch of stuff like “Buffy the Vampire Slayer”) and Billy (Bo Sharon) who sit around, read comic books and in Tommy’s case, work in his dad’s grocery store. The creepy adult gang called “the Vipers” picks on them and is led by Vinnie (A.J. Damato) whose 12 year old girlfriend Sally (Rebecca Herbst who you’ve seen in every 1990’s sitcom when one of the major characters needed a love interest for that episode) has a crush on Tommy, somebody actually her own age. The boys are also friends with a Haitian Voodoo priest who runs a comic book stand in their neighborhood, Mr. Sumatra (played by the late great Julius Harris who you’ve seen in everything). Tommy intent on getting revenge on Vinnie, kisses Sally and films his gang ripping off a car, he hands the tape over to the cops and the gang gets arrested. Vinnie gets away and goes to the local mob boss Moe (played by Meg Foster in male drag, love this actress, she is in so many low budget, B movies it isn’t even funny) to tell her and get money to bail out his buds. Moe also wants Vinnie to kidnap the boys, after getting out of prison the Vipers do just that but the boys get loose and steal bags of gambling slips to hand over to the cops, Moe orders Vinnie to kill them.

Yep kids get iced in this movie, this early in the movie you get an underage girl dating a 30 year old grease ball, a transgender mob leader and kids getting killed for gambling slips. Wooo. Damn but things are about to get hotter because Mr. Sumatra knows what really happened and he slips into the funeral home to get the murdered kid’s heads, he shrinks them and revives them with a voodoo ritual to get revenge. Each one has a different power, Tommy can shock people, Freddy can get people with a switch blade he carries in his mouth and Billy has vampire teeth that sucks people dry. Mr. Sumatra teaches them how to use their powers and did I mention these Shrunken Heads can fly? He then sends them out to get revenge.

They first practice on other criminals before moving up to the Viper gang and Moe. Sally still has the hots for Tommy and has a picture of him by her bed which later leads to some uh hum uncomfortable and laughable scenes. Whoever wrote this was a fucking genius…the person probably did too much coke and drank too much cheap vodka. Out this popped and the only person they could get to direct something this insane was Richard Elfman, who directed the awesome disasterpiece “Forbidden Zone”, then he gets his brother, Danny Elfman, who did music for Tim Burton’s “Batman” and was the lead singer of Oingo Boingo to do the music for his movie, and not only that the Oingo Boingo song “No One Lives Forever” in the movie. They only spent a million (and it shows) on this thing, practicing nepotism, Richard puts his son Bodhi in as the Viper gang member, Booger and this was Full Moon’s first theatrical release since most of all of Band and company’s releases were straight to video or cable. I couldn’t find the box office take on this thing, I imagine it wasn’t that big of take.

I don’t want to spoil too much but the people who get killed by the “Shrunken Heads” become zombies who don’t kill and eat people, they pick up litter, clean graffiti off walls and help old ladies across the street. Yep this visual white noise is insane, some are gonna see this as a mess, this is damn beautiful mess son and I enjoyed every damn minute of it. I wasn’t bored like I was at Marvel’s “Endgame”, I kept looking down at my phone wondering when this bloated, overripe, CGI enhanced piece of shit was gonna end so I could go to the taco shop outside the mall. Flying, killer, “Shrunken Heads”, what more can you ask for?

Meg Foster as Moe above.

Meg Foster from “They Live”. Heh. Heh. Heh.

Anyways if you want to watch the Shrunken Heads of murdered children attack and kill gangsters go here: