Visual White Noise Theater: Its “Baron Against the Demons” (2006) tonight, folks!!!

Its always refreshing for me to see practical effects, I know when it comes to movies I sound like a broken record but I can’t stress enough how much I hate CGI over saturation, unless your doing a straight CGI animated movie, if I see your movie has too much CGI there goes my popcorn at the screen and there I am walking out the door. Now when a movie comes along and uses 50/50 practical/CGI or better yet mostly practical (I know CGI can’t really be avoided, my ideal modern movie would be one that uses practical and optical effects through the whole thing). “Baron Against the Demons” is one of those 50/50 movies that is low budget, uses practical and green screen effects. Its a “Heavy Metal” comic strip brought to life and “Heavy Metal” also had a majority of European artists working for it, “Baron Against the Demons” is from Spain, and its unlike anything I’ve seen. Its jaw dropping: scantily clad women, spurting blood, a maniac sword wielding albino, foam rubber puppets, and Catholic fanatics in space. Uh yes tickle that white noise funny bone.

“Baron Against the Demons” was written by Ricarod Ribelle and is a expansion of a short film he did “Exocorio Deus Machine: La Mision”. When watching the movie its kind of hard to figure out the plot, the thing is a bit of a mess, visually its jaw dropping, for a low budget b movie they do get the best for what little money they had. I guess back in the mid to early 2000’s it was still kind of cheaper to use practical effects. From what I gather this takes place at the end of the 21st when demons either from outer space or hell have taken over the world.

A Catholic religious organization called “Exocorio Deus Machine” fight them to gain back control of the earth. The Baron is an fanatical, albino whirlwind of righteous violence, one of the new Crusade’s best warriors, he gets taken prisoner by a witch queen named “Lady Pervertum” she has sex with the Baron unwillingly and tortures him until he gives up his semen to inseminate the Ragnarok beast to breath into existence the anti Christ. This movie is a Gwar concert and a Heavy Metal comic strip rolled up in one.

The creatures and costumes are really Tokusatsu like, this seems like a “Power Rangers” for adults. The funny thing is, the only real nudity shown in the movie is the sex slaves carrying mutant babies and all those sex slaves are big titted foam rubber chicks in leather S and M get ups. In fact “Baron Against the Demons” plays on the pleasure/pain thing a lot throughout the movie. Also there is clown androids who laugh constantly and work for Lady Pervertum, the androids start to evolve, becoming religious, burying each other and worshiping the Baron as their messiah. Yeah this fucking movie is insane.

The Baron is bad ass, after being shot at, beaten, and tortured he still fights like a banshee not caring if he literally bleeds to death until all evil is exterminated off the face of the earth. He is a fanatical Catholic neo crusader but he finds out that there is much more going on with himself than just serving his Catholic war organization. Maybe its a language barrier but again this movie is all over the place, there is so many different elements, creatures and characters just thrown in a huge blender. Depending on what your tastes are like this movie will be the best thing you ever tasted (me) or you’ll spit it out and rinse your mouth out with salt water.

In “Baron Against the Demons” Satan shows up as a giant, red eyed worm waiting for the anti Christ to be born, it looks like a practical effect creature filmed and put into a computer to make it see through. One thing this movie really excels at is the various costumes and creatures in this movie, really the whole look and aesthetic of the movie overpowers the scattershot story, again this really reminds me of a “Heavy Metal” magazine comic strip. Its European, its erotic, its violent and it makes no sense.

So would I recommend this? Hell yes I will, this is one I wish more people watched and talked about. I’ve looked for more info on this movie and it was very bare bones when it came to finding info. The cast is all Spanish, there is supposedly a region 2 DVD out there with English overdubbed that was released, it isn’t streaming anywhere on any platform. Damn shame, this would be up Prime’s and/or Tubi’s dark, b movie alley.

This movie can’t make up its mind if its a weird S and M movie, a sci fi movie, a post apocalyptic movie, a horror movie etc. Its all those god dammit!!! “Baron Against the Demons” is a experience you won’t yet forget. Guaranteed, even if you hate it. So where do you experience…uh this thing on a physical plane? Well try here: In non existent.

But if you want to take a trip on the astral plane to experience it you can go here:

Your Welcome.